The Problem with Tommy
The problem with Tommy is he's not really there.
He's not playing a fiddle while rocking your chair,
he's not dancing a jig as he tousels your hair;
or screeching with glee as he flies through the air.
For he died last October,
when the maples stood bare,
while taunting a knife thrower
at the West County Fair...
So despite how he protests, and howls and declares,
and races stark naked through the busy town Square,
and despite how he chills you with his icy-cold glare,
The real problem with Tommy, is he's not really there.