Wednesday, July 02, 2008

Questions That Will Keep Me Awake Tonight-

-Nelson Mandela has just been taken off the U.S. Government's 'Terrorist Watch List'. Um, are you guys sure? Do you really think the 90+ year old African Nobel-Prize winner may NOT be about to bomb us all in our beds? Well, ok, I guess Dik knows best.

-Speaking of Dik, he's going to be in Boston for the 4th, to attend a special Re-Enlistment Ceremony being held on the USS Constitution, America's oldest commissioned warship. Now here's what's worrying me- since Dik is on record as having never been enlisted even ONCE, because he had "other priorities" during the Vietnam War, will his attending this "re-enlistment" ceremony cause a tear in the Space-Time Continuum, and lead to the extinction of the Universe?

and if not, why not?

-Now that Wall Street's big investors are about to lose money, does that finally mean the economy stinks?

-If George Bush thinks he can use the Constitution as toilet paper, can I use copies to heat my house this coming winter when heating oil goes above $6 a gallon?

-If all those internet stories are true, and Barack Obama is a Muslim, then why was everyone so upset about his Christian minister last month?

-What IS Angelina Jolie going to name her twins? Are Tweedledum and Mantuefel completely out of the running?

-Where the Hell is my marmalade?

-Has baseball ever had a more entertaining manager than Earl Weaver?

except possibly Butch Hobson?


Mike said...

Well since the only barometer the Repudlickums use to gauge the economy is Wall Street, yes, I guess now they will say that the economy sucks.

Beach Bum said...

Just a few months before 9/11 my wife and I spent a good portion of a day at the immigration office trying to convince them the orphaned Chinese girl we wanted or adopt would not be a danger to the country so Nelson had just as good a reason to be on it.

Malach the Merciless said...

Poor Butch, coaching Nashua . . . and is Angelina trying to eat that horse?

Phoebe Fay said...

Is Angelina french kissing a horse? And if so, well, that could explain all the fuss about this birth.

Cissy Strutt said...

Watch out lady! A horse might bite back! Oh no.

Sara Sue said...

She's kissing that horse like it was her brother!

P.S. Thank you for giving me a new word today! "dyspepsia"

Anonymous said...

thank you colonel for the picture today... in my world I assume things like that are just for me!!!