#10: Chinese Overthrow Own Government, Apologize to Dalai Lama & Taiwan, Pledge to Upgrade American 'Chinese' Restaurants.
#9: Clinton Admits to Pandering on Gas Tax, Drops Out of Race, Becomes Nun, Takes Vow of Silence.
#8: Obama Holds Entire Press Conference Without Any Stupid Question About Rev. Wright.
#7: Giant Flaming Salamander Takes Mitt Romney "Home".
#6: Triple-Crown Race Run Without Any Horse Dropping Dead on the Track.
#5: Video of Roger Clemens & A-Rod in "Love Nest" Posted on You-Tube
#4: Bill Gates Admits Windows Is 'Crap', Says He Just Bought an iMac.
#3: Oil Companies Nationalized, CEO's Sentenced to Spend Ten Years Pumping Gas at Filling Stations in Nebraska.
#2: Press Pushes McCain on Ties to Pastors Who Called Pope Benedict the 'Anti-Christ'.
and finally, the #1 headline I'd love to see in next month's newspaper-
Search for Vice President Cheney's Missing Aircraft Suspended.
Hey, let's all sing a song about assholes & hypocrisy-