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Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Turkey Daze - I


Well, the 2008 Thanksgiving turkey just got delivered, and I've spent the last hour chasing it around the living room with a hatchet. Free-range, my ass. This thing's feral. I'll bet they trapped it on the way over and threw it in the box.

And call me stupid, but I didn't think turkeys had teeth...

-to be continued.

10 comments:

jgodsey said...

i'm rooting for the turkey.

Mrs. Chili said...

Oh, Lord. You're one of THOSE people?!

I finished reading The Stand with The Dark and Stormy Book Club last month, and the whole scene where Mother Abigail goes to collect some chickens for dinner for her approaching guests really kind of freaked me out. If I were responsible for going out and killing my dinner, I'd turn into a vegetarian RIGHT. QUICK. I LIKE being distanced from my food's production, thank you very much.

Good luck with that, is what I'm sayin'. MY Thanksgiving dinner will start its relationship with me frozen and wrapped in creepy, flesh-colored plastic.

Malach the Merciless said...

Stay still, it follows movement

Phoebe Fay said...

Turkeys have very small brains and are easily entranced by shiny objects. Just hold up a picture of Sarah Palin and chant 'Drill Baby Drill,' and you'll be able to conk it on the head in no time.

Beach Bum said...

I feel your pain Colonel, I'll have several turkeys in my living room Thursday but they will be my in-laws. And yes, chasing them with hatchets has crossed my mind.

The Manic Street Preacher said...

What????? oh.... rooting FOR the turkey...I thought...oops

Turkey sandwiches until the New Year eh?

Joey Polanski said...

You shoud know bettr, Colonel.

Turkeys aint chicken.

AnnaBean said...

All you need to come out the winner is a lighter and a can of hairspray.

Sara Sue said...

Do you stew the giblets? Hope you and yours have a great Thanksgiving!

Colonel Colonel said...

Great suggestions, everyone!