Thursday, October 02, 2008

For Joey, & Cissy, & Atlas...

...and all my other fellow-poemers out there. We have anther poemer in our midst, a lady of infinite ability and a big bosom. A lady who makes sounding incomprehensible look incredibly easy.

The good folks at Slate.com have discovered this important new American rhymin' voice, so ladies & gentlemen, I am proud to present-

Sarah Palin, American Poemer!!

"You Can't Blink"

You can't blink.
You have to be wired
In a way of being
So committed to the mission,

The mission that we're on,
Reform of this country,
And victory in the war,
You can't blink.

So I didn't blink.

(To C. Gibson, ABC News, Sept. 11, 2008)


These corporations.
Today it was AIG,
Important call, there.

(To S. Hannity, Fox News, Sept. 18, 2008)

"Befoulers of the Verbiage"

It was an unfair attack on the verbiage
That Senator McCain chose to use,
Because the fundamentals,
As he was having to explain afterwards,
He means our workforce.
He means the ingenuity of the American.
And of course that is strong,
And that is the foundation of our economy.
So that was an unfair attack there,
Again based on verbiage.

(To S. Hannity, Fox News, Sept. 18, 2008)

"On the Bailout"

What the bailout does
Is help those who are concerned
About the health care reform
That is needed
To help shore up our economy,
Helping the—
It's got to be all about job creation, too.

Shoring up our economy
And putting it back on the right track.
So health care reform
And reducing taxes
And reining in spending
Has got to accompany tax reductions
And tax relief for Americans.
And trade.

We've got to see trade
As opportunity
Not as a competitive, scary thing.
But one in five jobs
Being created in the trade sector today,
We've got to look at that
As more opportunity.
All those things.

(To K. Couric, CBS News, Sept. 25, 2008)

"On Reporters"

It's funny that
A comment like that
Was kinda made to,
I don't know,
You know ...


(To K. Couric, CBS News, Sept. 25, 2008)


Move over, Emily Dickinson...


Catalyst said...

But . . . they don't rhyme!

Phoebe Fay said...

Brilliant. Now all you need to do is set those to music. Maybe a little flute music:

Colonel Colonel said...

Catalyst: Sexist!!

Phoebe: Oh.my.gawd. That video is disturbing on so many different levels...

Mike said...

So she does have some skills.

here today, gone tomorrow said...

I'm sooooo dreading the debate tonight.

Colonel Colonel said...

Mike: She's also got a great Facebook page!

HTGT: Every time she opens her mouth, God kills another subordinate clause.

Atlas Cerise said...

I'm not a VP expert
But I know this much is true:
Sarah Palin is a bitch
Who's got no fuckin clue

Colonel Colonel said...

The Guv'nor named Palin
said "trust me",
Even though I may be rather busty,
I know what is Right,
and come the dark night,
I promise you'll be rather crusty."

Malach the Merciless said...


C.Rag said...

Too bad Sarah Palin doesn't read...oh wait she reads all of them.

Hungry Mother said...

I'm impressed, but not changing my vote. We have a poet laureate to relieve the VP of the job of composing poems.

Colonel Colonel said...

Malach: And she speaks in tongues.

C.Rag: And she speaks in tongues.

HungryMo: Didn't Dik Cheney shoot the Poet laureate?

Beach Bum said...

Last night I think Sara and a parrot had an awful lot in common. If she had an actual real thought last night and not just spilled out all the garbage they drilled in her I would be very surprised.

Colonel Colonel said...

Beach: I suppose we have to ask if having a parrot in charge would be a step up from the chimp we have now...

Cissy Strutt said...

I heard a comment on the news that because she didn't fail quite as miserably as everyone thought she would, she "won" the debate. What the ???

Colonel Colonel said...

Cissy: Well, not "won" exactly, but didn't destroy the McCain campaign. most analysis here is that because she didn't look like an idiot the debate will have little ultimate effect on the campaign.

Ain't it grand?